New Phone

I just entered the 21st century with my new (work provided) Samsung GalexyS.  Very cool.  I can see the keyboard, my fingers aren't too big and I may even be able to BLOG right from my phone. Next thing you know I'll be all a twitter. What I don't know, is my phone number, or how to make a phone call, or how to answer the darn thing.  It's like holding a Bologna sandwich to my face.  Tom can hardly contain himself. He's the one in the house with all the gadgets and gizmo's...but he doesn't have one of these. It's like he has a new obsession, my phone.  He has downloaded the manual, read all about the fantastic features that I'll never use to include making cartoons and signalling the Starship Enterprise. All I need to do is talk to people for work, check my email messages from work and maintain a work calendar. I have no interest in Birds in Catapults or Pigs that Giggle. I have no time for those - - - - I just ate a Green apple - - - - messages or care to hear about the latest mishaps of housewives in sausage dresses. One ringy-dingy, Two ringy-dingy, HELLO.
So, until I can get this new notepad-like phone thingy down I will continue to carry and answer my dinky little flip phone - same number.

Where do I put it?  

Good news!

Test results say I'm normal.   That may be going a little too far, however, my biopsy results show no abnormal cells, pre-cancer cells, or creepy crawlers. 

Celebrate:  wine and cream puffs. 

home again, home again, jiggidy jig

This picture makes it look easy. NOT.  I had to pull my arm and shoulder through the hole , not just my breast - you know it couldn't just be easy. Crazy upside down, arm and left breast dangling through the portal of pain. Chin pressed on hard surface, my jaw taking the full weight of my head, edge of metal table pressing hard on my rib cage, the edge of the portal smashed against my neck, arm in a sling down below goes numb, right side no problem.  30 minuets of squishing, pulling, poking, repositioning -then THERE! Hold still, there. Another 30 minutes later the needle is confirmed to be in the right place - SIX cores were removed. I didn't feel a thing, this time.  Could be the distraction of my jaw slowing sliding out of it's hinge - or what ever jaws do.

Big bruise, bandage, lots of bleeding. Home resting.  I was at work and got a call asking if I could come in in the next 30 minutes, I could, but it would be without drugs or a driver. No Problem they said, you'll do fine. I did. So I had the procedure done this morning at 10:30, home by 12:30. Felt like a weekend. Dr. Darling was wonderful. She reminds me of the character in the Big Bang Theory-the woman nerd, but prettier.

Keep our fingers crossed - may be just old lady calcium deposits.  Didn't know I was a mining field for natures elements. The six core samples looked like short earthworms floating in the jar I had to witness and initial. Maybe too much information. I cam home and took drugs - slept - blogged. I'm doing good.  If this blog seems odd, it may be the drugs.  Love you all.  Will keep you up to date as I learn more.

7 minute Mono-gram updaate

We l l l l l l ...... Yep, I got the call back.  That pesty radiologist wants another look.  Now I understand why this person lives on another universe (never to be seen).  I didn't care for the phone call.  The young lady kept talking about my left breast only....I said, "honey, that's the only one I got, I don't think I'll get it wrong." I don't think she got it.  She then asked me if I had any history of cancer in my FAMILY!!!  Good - God, girl. read your notes, or something. "Darling, I only have one breast. It was almost a year ago today I got the call back following my mammogram, I don't have that breast anymore."  She still seemed dumb. Well, the radiologist would like you to come in, for your left breast only.  I'm thinking I wouldn't even know where to look for my right one. 

So I went for my follow up.  There are two little (and they keep stressing little) areas of interest.  Please slip your arm out of the sleeve and step up to the plate.  OUCH.. my lonely little left breast screamed. "don't get dressed yet". . . . . . . have a seat, but don't get dressed yet.  This is going to the radiologist right now.  It will be reviewed immediately (on Lord, I don't like the sound of that).

Next I'm re-introduced to the lady of the PINK - nurse navigator.  She wants to hug and hands me the box of tissues.  She has some lovely pink pamphlets with plenty of sticky notes highlighting points of interest. I see a biopsy consent form and pull it towards me as she yaks about how long it's been since we  last met. I reminder her it's been almost a year to date. 

I have two small spots that needs to be biopsied.  It will be tomorrow at 2:00pm.  It will take an hour.  I will be suspended face down on a platform with a hole where my LEFT breast will dangle.  Below a technician will press my breast between some glass plates, numb it with lanocane (hopefully enough) and extract a sample of the offending areas of interest - just to be safe.  Here, some tissues.

Golly, geeze.  I haven't layed flat on my stomach for almost a year.  It's going to be a challenge to rest in place on my new rock hard, and may I add painful, little right pseudo-breast  for an hour.  We'll give it try. I'll have the result is 2 to 3 days. 

Is this deja-vou all over again?   Anne-out  - were are my cheezy poofs?  

Say Cheeeeeze please

Cheetos I'm tired. Sitting back with a glass of cheap wine and a bag of cheezee-poofs, does it get better than this? I'm so tired, I've been working about 65 hours a week, coming home and crashing. Believe it or not we can't get people to apply for jobs in Medford - what's up with that? So I've been doing a lot of "grunt" work - caring for our disabled residents who demand 24/7 supports.  This takes a lot of physical strength, and believe it or not, I'm the healthy one among the workers. So I show up at all hours, all days of the week and give 'em what I got. I promised myself that I would put Tom on my calendar.  We had a little St.Patty's date at the local Irish Pub.  I was so BORING. What do people talk about with such zeal?  I had to apologize to Tom for not being more entertaining.  But it is what it is.  Or, better, I am what I am.

Had my mammogram yesterday.  WOW, my appointment was at 2:00pm and I was out of there, in my car, at 2:07.  One of the advantages of mono-boob. The technician was so nice, so efficient, so understanding and sensitive to my single breast situation.  She saw my Port scar and gently touched my shoulder to inquire if I still had my Port.  The gown thing wasn't weird, she let me just slip it down (not take my arm out of the sleeve) and gently slipped t back up without my knowledge when all was done. Nice. 

Oh yes, speaking of Dr. Nice (radiation guy).  He isn't in my Insurance Network, so I now owe him $8,000.  Great Scott!! Especially since his is the only practice in Southern Oregon.  I had to go to him, the only provider in the area. The closest in network is in Roseburg.  Can you imagine? driving or worse yet, staying in Roseburg for 6 weeks?  Golly Geeze.  So here I am trying to image how I can pay Dr. Nice and save money for Bailey's wedding.  Guess I'll be eating a lot of Cheezy-poofs.