Athans Holiday

Can't afford a Roman Holiday - the society of medical providers have their hand in my pocket book.  But I live in such a beautiful place and I can travel on line.  Thank goodness there isn't smell-o-vision.  Did a day trip to Grants  Pass for Sushi and drove the Applegate to pick up my summer wine club release.  My beautiful day started at the sample counters at COSTCO.  Just traveling the world of tasty cheeses, sausages and tri-tip beef.  Can't beat the hors'devours in fluted paper cups served by post menopausal blue hairs hawking their wares extracted from well traveled microwaves and steamers.  The congested aisles of over sized shopping carts remind me of city traffic, minus the round-a-bout.

I'm having a problem explaining my wrapped hand/arm. When people ask what happened I hesitate and see the "Ooops" in their eyes.  I try to pass it off with a quick explanation, but sometimes get sucked in to a prolonged empathetic story about a friend, a family member . . . or a "I've never seen anything like this".

Tommy and I tried coming up with a clever response - he kept coming up with "I got bit by a (insert weird animal here). I just tell them, it doesn't hurt, it's just a lymphedema compression bandage. That is usually followed by a pause and a "Oh" . The darn thing keeps creeping down my arm and is D R I V I N G   M E
C R A Z Y . 

Talk about clumsy, try using chop stick with the Michelin Man Hand.

Therapy Session

I love my sisters. I like sharing my stuff. But remember it's just stuff.  My healing and coping comes from my sharing.,  I am other-wise healthy and sound.  My journey isn't unique - that's sad, isn't it?  This journal is just like a therapy session. I have the most wonderful, compassionate and effective therapists.  You guys give me everything. I still worry my old worries, I still get a kick out of stupid-silly, I still enjoy watching the sparrows aerial ballet just off the deck-while Joey purrs. My life is good.  I'm not unhappy. I'm happy. Sometimes impatient, annoyed, and a little bit obnoxious (yes, I know I am), but GEEZE I am doing well. I like working, I like working hard and having a problems to solve. No one needs to worry for me, feel sorry for me, or feel less than supportive just because of distance.  You are all with me.  Thank  you. I am the luckiest person, I have you.  We are all lucky. We have each other. If I have learned anything from this journey it's that I have not listened enough.
This is my purge place - shake it off spot -  get over it and get on blog.

Would you like to share?

PS Pat.  A weight problem? Really? Share. Any panty antics?    Love Love Love

Geeze, I thought I was done

As I sit here and reflect on the past year, I realize how naive I was.  I really thought it would be "over" at some point. NOT!

I am now positive for Lymphedema - swelling in my limb. I will have this risk for the rest of my life. It is chronic and annoying. I have a "pressure point" in the palm of my right hand that feels like I have been pressing down on a nail head all day. My Index finger is swollen and hard - I have fibrosis (hardening) of the finger. This is caused by protein enriched fluid pooling in my finger.  Why? because  some of my lymph nodes have been removed which pump the fluid out and away from the limb.  The back of my hand is visibly swollen - the skin stretched taught. My axillary (armpit) is swollen and tender - the tuck 'n roll is puffy.

I am being treated. But it won't go away.  I have a wonderful team of women (no salamanders) who have experienced first hand breast cancer, mastectomy and lymphedema. Yeah!

So the treatment is making me crazy!!!  I have to wrap (a very specialized process) my fingers, hand and arm every night while in treatment. It's super crazy and frustrating. But it works. Then I wear a (temporary) compresion sleave during the day. All in preparation of being sized and fitted for my very own compression sleave and possible glove. Goody! Michael Jackson impression. 

I will tell my tale of wrapping woes later.  I'm not exactly the most patient person in the world (Boy is that an understatement) and this has been like going back to school - something I've never been very good at.